Cuban Scientists Accidentally Create Water

A team of scientists working at the University of Cuba has stumbled upon the chemical composition of water. A Sodium/Chlorine chemical nerve-gas defoliant experiment spiraled completely out of control in much the same manner of the Chernobyl nuclear reactor accident. As the casualties were being removed from the wreckage of the laboritory, located 16 scenic date palm lined kilometers from the Cuban capital of Havana, officials were quick to spot the tell tale signs of water.

As the process for combining uranium and chlorine began in the lab under strict environmental controls two of the scientists began quarreling over which elements on the periodic table were “sexier.” Jorge “Cliff” Ongalez-Ramirez claiming that helium was a better “high” and allowed for “funnier voices” while Jorge “George” Ramirez-Ongalez tried to shout him down. As the fists started to fly the lab became extremely unstable as the sodium-chlorine gas began eating away at the supporting columns. Soon the whole structure collapsed and the gas ignited. The resulting explosion could be heard as far away as Miami.

Cuban emergency services responded rapidly and were on the scene within hours. Elements of at least 5 different fire departments arrived during a tropical rainstorm and couldn’t understand how the fire kept getting worse as more rain fell. (Note: sodium and rain don’t mix.)

Authorities began evacuating people from the immediate area while still other firefighters arrived on the scene. As they did their thing to the fire it got worse and more explosions rocked the area. Eventually the entire laboratory vanished in a violent explosion that Vigdis Augustdottir heard on her farm near Reykjavik, Iceland.

“Yes. I heard it. It was like thunder from a long way away. Like Cuba maybe.”

Officials were able to approach as the toxic cloud dissipated and a large crater filled with water was revealed. Cuban officials concluded that the experiment “went wrong” somehow but that pure potable water remained. They are now trying to recreate the experiment in order to get fresh water to some of the poorer sections of Cuba’s population but torrential rains have delayed attempts.