She Was Gorgeous

She was gorgeous; anyone could see that. The way her tight, satin dress clung to her curves, the way her lips pouted when she wasn't talking, the way the waiters kept slipping in pools of drool collecting around her table as she tried to eat. The manager of Chez Fromage, a fashionable dining spot in the heart of downtown Budapest tried to approach the woman but was stopped in his tracks as she languidly stretched like a cat in her chair while the Captain of an passing airliner distractedly steered his Airbus into a nearby casino.

The manager gave his head a shake, checked to make sure his tie was hanging equidistant between his left and right shoulder and made his move. The vision before him was everything that everyman could and would desire. Indeed there were several men totally ignoring the females they had came into Chez Fromage with, the aforementioned females reaching for the Glock sandwiched between the rouge container and the Tic Tacs in their handbags. The manager approached the woman before him but before he could speak he slipped on a puddle and crashed to the floor, reaching for a floor lamp, missing but managing to jam his finger between the safe rubber cord end and the not-so-safe source for electrical power. His molars, suddenly free of their earthly home catapulted out the open window, past the now flaming casino, 2km's through
warm, humid air of Budapest and into the almost empty water dish of a cat named Freckles, owned by Enid and Oleg Podzeg.

The vision in the satin dress stood suddenly, smoothed out her dress and said "I hate when this happens." She was then arrested for 837 unpaid mattress tag violations.